“You’re not alone, together we stand. I’ll be by your side, you know I’ll take your hand when it gets cold and it feels like the end. There is no place to go, you know I won’t give in… No, I won’t give in. Keep holding on, cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through. Just stay strong ‘cause you know I’m here for you, i’m here for you.”—Keep Holding On - Avril Lavigne
I keep on having these dreams of you! It has been happening since Saturday and even though I like it, the same question has been haunting my mind since then… when is this going to stop? I feel like crap.. I am such a fool when it comes to love! @_@
Midday. Everything was ready and packed. I received a text, he’d probably be late. ‘Shit, I’m starving’ was the first thought that popped into my head. As I wasn’t in a hurry anymore, I checked my makeup twice and made sure that I was wearing the sweetest scent. Everything was perfectly arranged and I was finally able to meet him in Botafogo. When we finally got face to face, he just hugged me and gave me a cold ‘cheek to cheek’ kiss. I thought he was avoiding me. We headed to Lagoa (Lagoon) and took a walk around it while watching some boats sailing in a calm route. The sky was fiercesomely blue and it wasn’t that hot. I showed him what I’ve been doing during the last 2 days and he hugged me in a way of saying thank you. We ate and talked about silly things as we usually do. I laid down feeling all of this joy that I can’t even describe. He pulled my head in order to make me feel confy and showed me some songs he recently downloaded. He was also squeezing my tummy. I would stay like this forever if I could. We came to my grandpa’s to play my newest PSP game. He took a nap while we were on the bus and I gently stroke his dark hair. When he got up and noticed that he was actually laying on me, he pulled me into a big hug and kissed my forehead twice while saying thank you. We played PSP for 15 minutes before he noticed that he’d better leave. We went downstairs. He hugged me and kissed my cheek. I asked him to stay for a while as I probably wouldn’t find out anything else to do. He said he was afraid of getting stuck in a bad traffic because of Carnival. We tried to say goodbye again. I decided to say something before he was gone:
'I'm going to miss you, will you miss me too?'. 'No'. ‘I know you’re being ironic’. 'Ok, maybe I'll miss you a little bit'.
And after that, he pulled me and kissed me gently. We looked to each other. I kissed him again while we were walking backwards. He took a sit and pulled me to sit in his legs. We continued our soft kiss.
'I knew you were lying! You still like me'. And we kissed again. ‘But I still don’t want a serious relationship.’ 'Let's wait and see'. ‘Maybe we can stay like this’.
And he gave me a kiss and walked away leaving me surprised and speechless.
I can’t describe all of this excitement I’m feeling about today! I couldn’t have a nice night of sleep as I rolled around in my bed most of the time. I also dreamt about us. Omg, it really feels like the first time.
What’s the whole thing of living without experiencing new things? Today I’ve baked some cookies and printed a T-shirt. I’m sorry, I felt the need of telling you that it feels great even though I know this is so.. unnecessary and pointless?
The ugly truth is just like Tegan and Sara said in one of their lyrics, which always sounded quite pessimist to me, 'you won't get better 'till you're worse'. A couple of months ago, I’ve made a choice and a few promisses were established by us. In my opinion, promisses are things that shouldn’t be forgotten and broken so easily. You have to trust your own feelings and your heart in someone else’s hands without having a clue of what’s actually going to happen. Yeah, I know the future is uncertain, but as we’re human beings, we have expectations and it’s such a painful moment when you see all of your expectations falling apart and to notice that you’ll have to find another way of getting things done! Totally heartbreaking, but we shall never lose your hope, even though that’s is pretty tough.
What’s happening to me? I can’t stop dreaming about my future. Is it going to be good? Bad? I just want to find the answers. And I feel the need of trying again to reach you.
You went out without your boyfriend one night. You got terrible drunk, danced with somebody until the sunrise and you ended up kissing him in a way of saying ‘thank you for such an amazing night’. When you met your boyfriend and he asked you what have you done that night, you said you were sleeping and didn’t listen to your cellphone ringing.. that’s bullshit.
Who haven’t ever tell any lies may throw the first rock. I don’t know what is happening nowadays but people are lying for every stupid reason. I would love to know why that happens. Why is it so difficult to admit that you were wrong? Or to confess that you were guilty?
I can’t separate lies from human beings anymore and that makes me sad. Come on, even priests - that took some kinds of vows - are lying and hiding things from people! I’m not going to say that I never lied because that isn’t true at all, but at least I avoid them.
People, where have your dignity gone?
P.S: No, this story didn’t happen to me, it was just an example.
This is being such an odd summer: one day the rain shows up and keeps on falling all day long and on the other day our temperature is at about 40ºC and the only way of surviving is turning on the air-conditioner. Foreign people, please do not think it is a nice thing! When it rains a lot, our streets become rivers and people lose their homes and when it’s so fucking - sorry, I just couldn’t find a better word for describing this - hot, we have to make sure that we’ll be able to pay a giant light bill. I hate these hot days, I hate beaches, I hate sweating. Why am I still a brazilian? I don’t even like things a typical brazilian usually does. And that’s why I keep on saying: “C’est la vie, guys”.
Brazilian paper money is going to change. What a useless thing! There are plenty of things that need to be changed and our government is worried about such a stupid thing. I can’t believe it! Shame on you, BC.
After a long time seeing some Tumblr automatic posts on my twitter, I got to thinking what tumblr really was and I realised that I had no idea! In order to discover the answer of this dilemma, I decided to sign up - as you can see, I’m addicted to internet things/gadgets - and here I am typing my first post. This is probably going to be a ridiculous beginning, I know. If anyone get to read this crap, I hope you can forgive me for this lack of words. It’s still morning - a hot and sunny one, unfortunately - and my brain doesn’t want to colaborate. Have a nice day, guys :)